Exploring

Levi had a friend over yesterday.  I love it when this friend comes over because they play so well together.  There is always plenty of clean up to do afterwards but it is worth it in time and the joy of listening to happy laughter.  On bad days of missing Frankie, I am better if I can hear his laughter.  It sounds so unreserved, so happy, so .... healthy!  Ty and Levi went exploring and it involved elaborate set up and preparation, followed by; well nothing really!  After they had set everything up and organized a plan, they ditched everything and went and played on the trampoline!

Levi found a rope and they tied it to the tree and across the yard.  They had backpacks that were full.  What they were full of was any one's guess.  They both had goggles on, Levi night vision goggles and Ty with safety glasses. 

The boys ran around the yard until they were completely exhausted.  It all happened again today, as I was at work and Levi went to Ty's for the day.  I have to work the next two days but then I have a week off over Easter. 

I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook but it veers more on the side of love on days like yesterday.  I posted that I missed Frankie on his birthday and sometimes you get stories that I hadn't heard before.  I makes my heart feel lighter knowing that there are people other than Frank's three parents who miss him.  This from a sweet girl who would have been barely preteen when he died:

Miss you and love you both so much!  Happy birthday Frankie, you're always in my thoughts and my prayers and I can't wait to play with you again some day in an awesome bunk bed fort castle like you loved so much.  And you still can protect me from the dragons with your shield and sword because, as you told me; "You're the girl, so you have to be the princess, but princesses can have swords too.  If you want to hold it for a minute, then give it back when I hear a dragon coming, then I need it"!  I'll always remember our playdates, my little knight.  I love you birthday boy and sending all my love to you Susie, the most amazing and strong mother I have ever known.  Xoxo

It is such a pleasure to read memories that I don't have. 

I think that William Blake summed it up, the feeling that you have giving birth;

To see a world in a grain of sand
And a heaven in a wild flower
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
And eternity in an hour.

For me it is the idea that for but a moment, you hold the future in one hand.  That it changes both you and the child.  But the end of that poem should have warned me;

Every night and every morn
Some to misery are born
Every morn and every night
Some are born to sweet delight
Some are born to sweet delight
Some are born to endless night