Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Still coughing, Still going

Levi continues to cough in the background as I type this. It is a little frustrating that I can't really trust the school to look after his asthma. On top of that I still feel a little off and I don't sleep very well while he coughs. There are just parts of brain that I can't switch off. It is a very unconscious part because it only really happens when I am sound asleep. There is a part of me that wakes instantly to his coughing beside me. It isn't the regular sort of waking to check and then resuming the sleep, there is instead a surge of adrenaline that takes a little while to purge from my system. It is then that I think of Frank and think of Levi. I lie there and pray for Levi's future. I pray in my way, thinking of the future that remains so bright for one little boy.
Tomorrow very early Jane flies out to Abu Dahbi. Blindly going into a future that I hope is bright for her too. I am nervous for her and have no way of alleviating that concern. Some of it is that she approaches everything differently than I do or would, perhaps even opposite. I don't disagree with the idea of travelling overseas to work, but I would have done extensive research into the country and it's customs. I would go into it knowing the culture and the food. Perhaps going in blindly is a better way to go. It just isn't my way. There is nothing I can do now anyway, so I am wishing her well and hoping for the best!

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